What is Photography to me?

I do not view photography as just a medium for capturing photos, or as a mere subject, or anything of that nature. I look for a person’s soul; I find their love or their chaos, the light and the darkness, the glow and the dimness. I am not seeking these qualities consciously—it is simply what I am attracted to.

I never used to notice these qualities in myself. I would always try to understand why I kept attracting the same type of people. For me, it was exhausting. But as I gained life experience and grounded myself—as I was able to exhaust my own fear-based controls, my emotional dependence on others, and the need for external validation or fulfillment—I noticed a shift in my photos as well. A shift occurred in what I wanted to develop within the frame and what would naturally occur. I think it was a freedom from outcome, a freedom from any perfection or approval. I stopped seeking and let the photos occur as they would, instead of forcing a necessary outcome.

I let my ego die, as without the ego, I did not need an upper hand. If the work developed in the correct retrospective of the emotions, it would be received with, that was all that mattered to me. I do not go around comparing my work with anyone. If someone made a reference to another artist, that is grand, but I dismiss it instantly. I seek for my photography to be authentic in its capture of light, movement, and the subject in a way no one has or will again; that is the basic concept of how I dive into this medium.

It is also easy for me to establish the human connection behind the lens. There is a famous statement that "the camera never lies," which is true to some extent, but people often want you to feel a certain way about them and want to be noticed for that projection. I let it happen, and I don't. Meaning, I won’t just take one photo. It does not matter where I am or with whom; I will shoot the same frame or the same photo a million times if I have to. From your perspective, it might be madness, but those are simple binary terms. The reason I do this is that I want to strip away the core of the subject—to the being that they are—and that takes time. It cannot just happen in one shot. If they do not agree or cannot view themselves in that fashion, that is their choice, but I make mine the moment the session starts.

I think the fascination I have with this medium is the distance and the closeness that can be held at the same time. The subject is always present but never touched; always available but always distant. I think it was the avoidance in me that was fascinated by this dynamic. It would create a sense of euphoria in my system, which then created the excitement and enthusiasm the subject would feel, eventually landing in the photos.

I am also heavily drawn to moods, light, and the overall nature of exposure—not that I have a specific technique or purposely model my shots after it. If I am in the studio, yes, I play with lighting a lot. But on the streets or on the road, I let nature do its business, and I do mine. I love the flow of the movement of light as it dances over the subject, and the camera captures it. It is sensual; it is sensitive. It is a dance where my camera and I make love as many times as we can to then view the birth of the child: the pictures.

Do I seek inspiration from famous photographers who have "made it"? If I have to name-drop: Annie Leibovitz, Diane Arbus, Robert Capa, Robert Adams, Saul Leiter, Dorothea Lange, and lastly, Tatsuo Suzuki. I would have to say yes and no. I have viewed their work, and it has left a mark on me. Do I incorporate it into my work? Consciously, no. Subconsciously, yes, perhaps—though I am not aware of it.

My fundamental goal is to capture the light, the essence of the subject, the people, the landscape, or the portraits. I look for that whether I am using a digital medium or an old film camera; the diversification is still the same. As I mentioned before, I keep the ego and the thoughts out of it. I seek the sublime, which is to become one with the medium, the surroundings, and the narration in front of me. I see creation, and I hope creation seeks me back. That is my whole goal.